Flirtatious
by Belles7
Summary: Akashi flirting? Woah.
1. Chapter 1

**Flirtatious**

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><p>Summary: In which Akashi needs some help with Calculus. Why not ask his buddy Kuroko Tetsuya, eh?<p>

Rating: T?

A/N: I AM BACK PEOPLE! Sorry for the wait...had to deal with some oddballs...and so I will give you all a gift for waiting? lol. better than two months. Don't know if you can even call it a gift, but here you go~ ;)

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><p>"Akashi-kun." Kuroko stared at the redhead with a deadpan expression. He crossed his arms and glanced at the sheet of calculus math problems sitting on the desk. "Why did sensei tell me to tutor you?"<p>

Akashi tilted his head. "What do you mean, Tetsuya? It's self explanatory. I need a little help with my Calculus, can you integrate my natural log?"

"Akashi-kun, you aced the last test."

"Ah," Akashi said, smiling knowingly. "But that test was based on the last three sections we learned. I don't understand how to do these new lessons, Tetsuya."

Kuroko leaned closer to the redhead, scrutinizing the pleased expression on his friend's face. He hesitantly said, "...Fine. I guess Akashi-kun does have a point."

Akashi nodded, smiling even wider now. It was only just him and Kuroko sitting in this empty classroom after school. Preferably, he'd like to have the bluehead teaching in his bedroom, but this was good enough for him.

"Which problem does Akashi-kun need help with?"

Akashi blinked, slowly shutting his eyes as those crimson lashes battered once. Red-yellow eyes gradually opened, revealing a yearning and scheming look, and by some miraculous chance, the milkshake lover failed to see that look.

"Well, I don't understand this problem, Tetsuya."

Kuroko stared at the paper with confusion and looked back at the teen. "Akashi-kun. Which problem? The one with sine?"

Akashi merely nodded. He didn't really have a problem he needed help with, but any math problem done together with Kuroko was worth the effort. "Yeah."

"But there's more than just one problem with sine, Akashi-kun."

The redhead finally glanced at the problems. "Hm. Well, Tetsuya, what's your sine?"

"Akashi-kun. I am not going to let you copy off my problems." A dead serious expression appeared on the blue head's stern face.

Akashi chuckled in amusement at the odd response. He'd never understand Kuroko's way of thinking, but meh, that's what made the phantom so desirable. "No, Tetsuya. I meant the problem where we have to find the domain and range in order to find the solution."

"What problem is that?"

Another chuckle was all he got before Akashi muttered in a husky voice only loud enough for the two of them to hear, "I don't know if you're in my range, but I'd sure like to take you back to my domain, Tetsuya."

"Huh?"

"I'll take you to your limit if you show me your end behavior."

"End behavior? Limits? You don't understand those concepts, Akashi-kun? We studied them last year. You need to brush up, Akashi-kun." Kuroko tilted his face an angle, giving the redhead a good view at his jawline.

Akashi propped his elbow on the desk they both shared and placed his chin on an open palm, quirking one side of his lips upward. "Are you a 45 degree angle? Because you're acute-y."

"Akashi-kun. Angles were taught in grade school."

Akashi nodded, his mismatched eyes locking onto Kuroko with intensity. "Yes, Tetsuya. I know that. We've been together since then. Being without you is like being a metric space in which exists a Cauchy sequence that does not converge."

Kuroko nodded slowly, uncertain of where things were going now. Blue orbs shifted to the paper. "So, about the problems, Aka-"

"Shhh." Akashi pressed a finger against Kuroko's lips. He was currently leaning over the desk, intruding on the phantom's personal space, as a smile graced his lips. "Let me finish, Tetsuya. If I were a function, you would be my asymptote - I always tend towards you. I wish I was your problem set, because then I'd be really hard, and you'd be doing me on the desk."

Kuroko sat completely rigid and still in his chair as the redhead retreated back into his seat, sitting properly again. Did Akashi just wink at him?

"Well, Tetsuya?"

The bluehead remained frozen, confusing the redhead even more. Akashi pursed his lips. Perhaps he didn't fully convey his message to the boy then? He added, "I hope you know set theory because I want to intersect and union you. I'd like to plug my solution into your equation, Tetsuya."

Kuroko finally blinked. "I am not a math problem, Akashi-kun, and stop being so weird. It's confusing. We're supposed to be talking about math problems."

"But we are."

"No. We are not."

"Yes. We are." Akashi pulled his graphing calculator out from beneath his desk and 'accidentally' dropped it on the ground, making a loud clattering noise. "Darn it. Let me pick it up and then we can continue, Tetsuya, okay?"

Kuroko was already standing up and bending down to grab the device that somehow happened to be on his side of the desk. "That's okay, Akashi-kun. I'll get it for you."

The red head tilted his head, his eyes gazing and assessing the teen. He murmured, "Nice asymptote, Tetsuya."

The boy whirled around, feeling an odd feeling shoot throughout his body. There were tingling chills creeping along his spine now. He clutched the calculator in his hand, gripping it tightly. "Akashi-kun. There are no asymptotes."

"Oh really? My apologies. I guess my eyes deceived me."

Kuroko sat down in his seat again and began to hand the calculator back to Akashi, when all of a sudden, the redhead shook his head and instructed, "Tetsuya, would you mind turning on the calculator for me?"

"...Sure."

Akashi linked both his hands now and set his chin on top of them, his body leaning towards Kuroko. He grinned as a shocked expression crossed the normally deadpan face. A pink blush appeared on those fair cheeks and when Kuroko finally lifted his face to look at him, Akashi recited with a triumphant look, "I can figure out the square root of any number in less than 10 seconds, Tetsuya, and I know you're good at math too. So how about this? Let's add a bed, subtract our clothes, divide your legs, and multiply."

Kuroko shook his head in disbelief and laughed quietly. "You must be the square root of two because I feel irrational around you, Akashi-kun."

"Alright, no more play time. Let's do some chemistry."

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><p><strong>AN:** FYI: graphing calculators can store words. That's what Akashi did with his little message Oh and the calculus pick up lines came from: pickuplinesgalore . com  
>I cannot come up with pickup lines by my own brainpower XD<p> 


	2. Chapter 2

**Flirtatious**

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><p>Summary: Hi. How can I help you with...*cue lustful heterochromic eyes*...well. Hello to you too~<p>

A/N: Enjoy :D

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><p>"Kagami-kun, I told you you could just wait in the car," Kuroko said, turning back around to look ahead now. He opened the computer shop's door and entered. A ringing bell chimed, signaling his entrance, and a redhead, located somewhere behind the counter, did not turn around to greet them as he was too busy stocking up the shelves hovering on the wall.<p>

"Well, Kuroko, you think I want to sit in the car for who knows how long? It's freaking hot in there! I could get a heat stroke and die!"

"You'll survive, Kagami-kun," the bluehead muttered as he now stood in front of the counter under a large sign that said: 'Fix It Right Here'. He glanced at the taller redhead and said, "Be quiet. This won't take long."

"Tch. That's what you said last time!"

"Go sit in the car."

"No."

"Then go look around. Don't stand there and complain. It's annoying."

"Fine! I'll be over there then." Kagami sauntered to the nearby aisles, checking out the technical equipments.

Kuroko stared at the employee and waited for a few more minutes. He tapped a finger on the glass counter and soon knocked on the surface while clearing his throat. "Excuse me, sir, but-"

The redhead turned around, revealing a young man who seemed to be around Kuroko's age, and he offered a polite smile as he greeted, "Hi. How can I help you with..."

Blue brows quirked upward at the sudden pause. "...Yes?"

"Well. Hello to you too~." Akashi walked closer to the counter, standing directly across from the customer now. He stood tall and straight, measuring their heights unknowingly to Kuroko. "My name is Akashi Seijuro. Nice to meet you."

Kuroko nodded, pointing at the little name tag. "I can see that, Akashi-san."

The redhead simply chuckled. "My apologies. I forgot about this." He touched the little metal plate on his shirt with a finger. When he looked back at the customer, he cocked his head and narrowed those eyes of his. "Say, have we met each other before?"

Kuroko shrugged. "I don't know."

"Do you come here often?" Akashi asked, shifting his eyes to the closed laptop sitting in between them. "To fix your stuff?"

"I do. Last time I came here for some tech help and a...man with purple hair was assigned to help me with my problem. I don't think he did a good job though."

"Ah. That must be Atsushi," Akashi murmured, making a mental note to scold the co-worker later. "What do you need help with today...?"

"The name's Kuroko Tetsuya. My laptop's infected...with a virus or maybe a trojan? I'm not too sure."

The employee nodded, flashing the bluehead a tiny smile. "Tetsuya? I like it."

"Um...thanks?"

Akashi proceeded opening the laptop and as he did the basic steps, he asked, "So how long has your laptop been like this, Tetsuya?"

"About a week or two now."

"Do you know the cause of this?"

A grim look crossed Kuroko's face. Akashi quirked a red brow, leaning against the glass counter for support now. He wore an amused expression as he waited for the reply. Kuroko sighed and relented, "I lent my laptop to a friend."

"And what did this friend of yours do?"

Kuroko stared at the redhead, deadpan. "Must I really say it, Akashi-san?"

"Akashi-kun is fine and yes, you must tell me. I need to know so I'll have a better grasp of the situation, Tetsuya."

"We're strangers and fine, I'll tell you. My friend used my laptop to watch porn."

Akashi's hands fell away from the laptop as if it had contagious diseases all over it. He stared at the device and glanced at Kuroko. "Your...porn-obsessed friend doesn't happen to be that one standing over there, right?"

The phantom pointed at Kagami and said, "Kagami-kun? No. It was a different person, Akashi-san."

"Akashi-kun is fine, preferably Seijuro though."

"Anyways," Kuroko said, cutting the conversation off. "What's wrong with my laptop?"

"Mmm...hold a sec," Akashi murmured softly, his eyes were half-closed as they scanned the screen in a meticulous fashion. They would shift left and right, up and down, in a quick manner as his fingers dexterously moved all over the keyboard. "I'm running a diagnostic check right now, Tetsuya. Is that fine with you?"

"Sure."

An amused smile grew on Akashi's lips. "You still use Internet Explorer? You must like it nice and slow."

Kuroko slightly frowned. "I have other browsers installed on my laptop as well."

Akashi looked up at the bluehead and smiled. "I can see that, Tetsuya. How 'bout I take off your cover and insert a bigger CPU?"

A confused look crossed the blue head's face. "You...can do that?"

The employee nodded, smirking. "If you have an empty slot, I have the card to fill it."

"I'm sorry, Akashi-san, but could you elaborate some more? I am not too tech savvy when it comes to these things."

Akashi waved a hand, reassuring the male, as he re-focused on the laptop again. He typed some stuff into the command prompt and muttered, "No worries, Tetsuya. I'll fix it."

"Yes. You're supposed to."

"Unless...you're laptop's completely toasted, then that is out of my hands." Akashi snuck a look at the scowling bluehead who was currently plotting how to avenge his device if that was true. Aomine would be in a world of...no more gravure magazines for sure.

Wanting to hear the customer's voice again, Akashi informed, "You have a trojan on your laptop. I'm currently working on removing it. Do you have any important files you need to save?"

Kuroko shrugged. "I don't think so."

"Good because I'll have to reboot your laptop as well."

"Go ahead." The bluehead shifted uncomfortably in his spot. "Is there something on my face, Akashi-san?"

Akashi shook his head, snapping out of his little daze. "I didn't mean to ogle you, but I'd sure like to Google you."

"You must really love technology, Akashi-san, for you to use technology in simple talks like this."

"I do work in a computer shop, Tetsuya. Though, I love basketball much more."

Blue eyes widened with excitement. "So do I."

Akashi smiled. "You auto-complete me."

Wariness soon filled those blue orbs. "...You say the weirdest things, Akashi-san."

"I suppose that's because you are hotter than the bottom of my laptop, Tetsuya. Want to see my HARD Disk? I promise it isn't 3.5 inches and it ain't floppy."

Kuroko paled. This random guy was flirting with him and this guy was hinting at sex. "Erm...Akashi-san, I'm pleased to know that you are attracted to me, but I must humbly reject your offer."

"Offer? Tetsuya, I haven't even offered anything yet."

"You just implied that you want to have sex."

"I think you could be an integral part of my project life cycle, Tetsuya."

"Meaning?"

"I'd like to get to know you and not just have sex with you. I don't do one-night stands, Tetsuya," Akashi phrased, smiling now. He had his chin on one hand with his elbow propped on the counter. He ran the other hand through his crimson hair and winked at the bluehead. "I get off work in a few hours. We could go for a drink?"

Kuroko took a step back in caution. "You're not some kind of creep are you?"

Akashi chuckled. "I won't deny that I'm attracted to you. In fact, I was wondering if you'd like to go back to My-Space, so I can Twitter with your Yahoo, until I Google all over your Facebook?"

"That was...I get the feeling that you implied sex again, Akashi-san."

"Yeah. I did. So, what do you want? Get to know each other through sex or talk it out over a drink?"

"How about none of the above?" Kuroko answered, crossing his arms. He gave the redhead an unyielding look.

Akashi grinned and pulled out his phone. He held a finger up. "I need to hop over to Facebook for a second to change my status to smitten. You are one hell of a being, Tetsuya."

The phantom deadpanned. "I don't know if I should feel flattered or disgusted, Akashi-san."

"Of course you should feel flattered. After all, I, Akashi Seijuro, do not easily fall for people. You are an extraordinary exception, Tetsuya."

"Kuroko! Hurry up! I want to go back already!" Kagami irritatedly said, walking back over to them. He placed a large hand on the crown of blue hair and gave Akashi a lazy glance, not paying much attention to the guy at all. He looked back down at Kuroko and prodded, "Well?"

Akashi smiled, looking like the good and perfect employee he ought to be. He tilted his head, feigning an innocent look. "Yes, Kuroko-san. It appears that you have other things to take care of as well. That's perfectly fine with me. I can have your laptop fixed by this evening. Would you be open around that time?"

Kuroko looked at Kagami. He wasn't sure whether he should be angry as hell or grateful to the idiot.

"Of course you're free at night, Kuroko!" Kagami replied. He jabbed a finger at the smaller male and looked at Akashi, answering, "He'll be back tonight to pick it up, dude. Come on, Kuroko, let's go to maji burgers. I'm starving!"

Before Kuroko could stab Kagami in the ribs with a hand, he heard Akashi call out in a sweet voice, "You can put a Trojan on my Hard Drive anytime, Kuroko-san."

"Kagami-kun, let's go. Now."

Kagami scratched his head in confusion as the bluehead rushed outside the shop and jumped into the car, almost leaving him behind.

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><p>AN: I have no idea why I am sooooo into writing akakuro pick up line stories. It's just really interesting! Again, these tech pick up lines came from: pickuplinesgalore . com


	3. Chapter 3

**Flirtatious**

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><p>Summary: Akashi's going Harry Potter on Kuroko!<p>

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><p><em>In dedication to:<em>

_My dear weirdoes, if you come across this chapter, or in fact, take the time to read all of my other stories, I hope you enjoy the magical world of Akakuro._

_All hail Akashi ;)_

_Thanks so much for pissing me off. _

_Now, let me return the favor._

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><p><strong>AN:** To you readers, ignore my dedication. It's meant to piss some people I know off. *evil laugh*

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><p>"Harry Potter?" Akashi questioned, eyeing the book in Kuroko's hands. He tilted his head. "I didn't know you were into that series that bad, Tetsuya."<p>

"I absolutely love Harry Potter, Akashi-kun."

The redhead narrowed his eyes. "Absolutely?"

Kuroko nodded, looking deadpan as ever. "I love Harry Potter a lot."

Akashi leaned back in his chair, his eyes scanning the empty library. "Take a seat, Tetsuya."

The blue head sat next to Akashi and began to open his book, making the red head quickly say, "Wait, Tetsuya."

"Hmm?"

"I…am quite fond of Harry Potter as well."

Kuroko cocked his head in confusion. "But you said-"

"I lied about not reading Harry Potter. I've read it all."

"Akashi-kun lied? You said you didn't like Har-"

"I absolutely love Harry Potter, Tetsuya," Akashi said in a 'don't-you-dare-question-me' tone.

"Oh…kay," the phantom teen said hesitantly, resuming with his book again. Akashi pressed his lips into a firm line and furrowed his brows. Why did Harry Potter have to steal his lover's attention now? Kuroko Tetsuya was _his_ boyfriend.

"Tetsuya."

Kuroko looked back up at his lover again. "Yes?"

"Being without you is like being afflicted with the Cruciatus Curse."

"So you really were lying to me about not reading the books, Akashi-kun."

The redhead shrugged. "I did see some of the movies too." That was a complete lie. He never read the books and he never watched the movies because he deemed it as a waste of time. However, he did listen to Kuroko chat non-stop about the books and now, he was very glad that he paid close attention.

Kuroko smiled. "Let's go on a Harry Potter movie marathon, ne?"

Akashi simply replied, "Your smile is like Expelliarmus. Simple but disarming, Tetsuya."

"You must be my horcrux, because you complete me, Akashi-kun."

The redhead returned the smile with his own. Maybe Harry Potter wasn't so bad after all? "You must be magical, because I've fallen under your spell, Tetsuya."

Kuroko shut his book, making a thump sound, and focused all his attention on the redhead. Akashi grinned at the sudden action. If you can't beat them, join them, and oh how glad he was to have some knowledge on Harry Potter. The blue head leaned closer and said, "You can have the port key to my heart."

A smirk slowly crept onto the red head's face. "One night with me and they'll be calling you MOANING Myrtle."

"Hmm…interesting one, Akashi-kun." Kuroko was about to lean away, but the lover gently grabbed his chin and kept his face in place.

"We're not done yet, Tetsuya."

There was a sparkle in Kuroko's blue eyes. "Please entertain me then, Akashi-kun."

"Do you want to head to the Shrieking Shack? We could do some shrieking of our own."

The blue head simply laughed.

Akashi continued, "Are you using the Confundus charm or are you just naturally mind blowing?"

Kuroko shook his head. "I'm a natural."

"I'd let you handle my wand any day, Tetsuya."

Blue eyes shifted downward and an amused smirk graced his lips. "Yes. Indeed, Akashi-kun. Is that a wand in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?"

"Hmm?"

Kuroko pointed at the bulge in Akashi's pants and flashed him a lovely smile. The red head glanced downward and chuckled. "My wand's so happy to see you, Tetsuya. I wanna stick my half-blood prince inside your chamber of secrets, and release the prisoner of Azkaban to give you the deathly hallows."

Akashi closed the tiny distance, bringing his face closer to Kuroko's, and kissed the blue head. When the chaste kiss finished, Kuroko replied, "Going to bed? Mind if I Slytherin?"

"Whaddya say you and me go look for the Room of Requirement?"

Kuroko stood up and followed Akashi out the library. "I suppose that happens to be your bedroom, Akashi-kun?"

"You're a genius, Tetsuya."

"Why thank you very much, Akashi-kun."

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><p>AN: Ahahahaha. *deadpan expression* Hope you enjoyed~ ;)

pickup lines came from the same place as the previous chapters


	4. Chapter 4

Twitter Love

Summary: In which madness ensues on Twitter. Pick up lines are cut off. Kise is going to hell. People are mad and disappointed.

A/N: Oh and that damn 'at' sign was not working when I updated this chapter! Enjoy~

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><p><strong>Tetsuyaforever: (at VMilkshake)<strong> Tetsuya is that you?

**VMilkshake: (at Tetsuyaforever) **Who are you?

**Tetsuyaforever: (at VMilkshake) **I'm your lover, Tetsuya.

**VMilkshake: (at Tetsuyaforever)** I don't have a virtual lover.

**Tetsuyaforever: (at VMilkshake)** Tetsuya, it's me. Seijuro.

**VMilkshake: (at Tetsuyaforever)** …Akashi-kun, is that really you?

**Tetsuyaforever: (at VMilkshake)** There's only one me, Tetsuya. You like my username? I know you do.

**VMilkshake: (at Tetsuyaforever) **I'd rather you not do that, Akashi-kun. It's embarrassing.

**Tetsuyaforever: (at VMilkshake)** What's embarrassing is you not using my name as your Twitter username, Tetsuya. That's okay though. I know you love me. When and why did you make a twitter?

**VMilkshake: (at Tetsuyaforever)** Just made it for a vanilla milkshake freebie thing earlier today.

**Tetsuyaforever: (at VMilkshake)** Why is Ryota on your friend list? I should be the first one to friend you.

**VMilkshake: (at Tetsuyaforever) **I apologize, Akashi-kun. Let me go unfriend all of them and let you friend me first.

**Tetsuyaforever: (at VMilkshake) **Thanks, love. I appreciate that.

**VMilkshake: (at Tetsuyaforever)** I won the vanilla milkshake sweepstake, Akashi-kun.

**Tetsuyaforever: (at VMilkshake) **That's my boyfriend. I love you, Tetsuya. Defeat all of your opponents. Just friended you.

**VMilkshake: (at Tetsuyaforever)** Yes. I will go claim my prize tomorrow morning and now I will delete my account. Bye, Akashi-kun.

**Tetsuyaforever: (at VMilkshake) **Wait what? Not so fast, Tetsuya. Stay on for a bit longer.

**VMilkshake: (at Tetsuyaforever)** Why? My business is done. I am not familiar with Twitter and its ways.

**Tetsuyaforever: (at VMilkshake)** There are things I must tell you, love. Once I am done, you can delete your account.

**VMilkshake: (at Tetsuyaforever)** Okay. What is it?

**Tetsuyaforever: (at VMilkshake) **I usually don't follow someone on the first night, but for you I'll make an exception.

**VMilkshake: (at Tetsuyaforever) **...Well, I just barely made this account.

**Tetsuyaforever: (at VMilkshake) **If you were a tweet, I'd favorite you, but I wouldn't retweet you. I don't want to share you with anyone else.

**VMilkshake: (at Tetsuyaforever)** Um, thanks? I think that is a good thing, right?

**Tetsuyaforever: (at VMilkshake)** Yes, Tetsuya. It is a very good thing. I could read your random thoughts all night long.

**Kurokocchi_mybae: (at VMilkshake) **Kurokocchi, who you talking to? Be safe! This person sounds evil! Too stalker-ish for your safety!

**VMilkshake: (at Kurokocchi_mybae)** Kise-kun, is that you? Your name switched.

**Kurokocchi_mybae: (at VMilkshake) **Yeah, some jerk hacked my account just a while ago. I made a new one. Hihihi :)

**Tetsuyaforever: (at Kurokocchi_mybae)** Change your name.

**Kurokocchi_mybae: (at Tetsuyaforever)** No. Who the hell are you! Stay away from my boyfriend.

**Tetsuyaforever: (at Kurokocchi_mybae)** Hm. You, Kise Ryota, are asking to be killed. Tetsuya belongs to me. I know where you live, where you go to school, how tall you are, your crush, your favorite color, what shampoo you use, your basketball team-

**VMilkshake: (at Kurokocchi_mybae)** Kise-kun, I am not your boyfriend. You are currently talking to Akashi-kun.

**Kurokocchi_mybae: (at VMilkshake)** Kurokocchi, you're wrong. Akashicchi's twitter name is: YourRedEmperor. I think you've mistaken this guy. Don't let him trick you!** (at Tetsuyaforever) **Evil be gone! Away with you! . \_/.

**Tetsuyaforever:** **(at ****Kurokocchi_mybae) **Kise Ryota. Male. 16. 171 cm. 77kg. Birthday: June 18th. Gemini. Blood type A. Attends Kajio High School. Basketball team position: small forward. Skill: copying players. Basketball captain: Kasamatsu Yukio. Shampoo used: Herbal Essence-

**Kurokocchi_mybae: (at Tetsuyaforever) **WHO ARE YOU? GET LOST, CREEP! AND STAY AWAY FROM KUROKOCCHI OR ELSE YOU'LL REGRET IT! DON'T MAKE ME GO GET _YOURREDEMPEROR!_

**Tetsuyaforever: (at Kurokocchi_mybae)** You insolent brat. I am Akashi Seijuro.

**VMilkshake: (at Kurokocchi_mybae, Tetsuyaforever)** * sigh *

**2good4u: (at Kurokocchi_mybae)** You dumbass, have you ever heard of creating double accounts?

**Kurokocchi_mybae: (at 2good4u) **Aominecchi~ I AM NOT A DUMBASS….you sure this is Akashicchi?

**2good4u: (at Kurokocchi_mybae)** Yeah. Peace. I'm out. Not seeing you in hell, Kise. Imma be up in heaven.

**Kurokocchi_mybae: (at 2good4u)** Aominecchi? Aominecchi? YOU LOGGED OFF?! WHYYYYYY~?

**YourRedEmperor: **Death is inevitable.

**Kurokocchi_mybae: (at YourRedEmperor) **AKASHICCHI~! SAVE ME! I'm being cyber bullied and Kurokocchi is being hit on by a creep!

**VMilkshake: *** sigh again *

**YourRedEmperor: (at Kurokocchi_mybae)** I meant _your_ death is inevitable, Ryota. **(at ****Tetsuyaforever)** how should we kill him?

**Tetsuyaforever: (at YourRedEmperor)** Hack him first. Destroy his account. Go for his emails designated for Twitter and all social media sites. Then obliterate his laptop.

**YourRedEmperor: (at Tetsuyaforever)** That is too safe. You handle that then. I'll kill him. We both win. He loses. There's nothing for Ryota to gain.

**Tetsuyaforever: (at YourRedEmperor)** How will you kill him? Skin him alive and boil him? Carve his heart out and feed it to a pack of wolves? Poison? Assassinate him while he's sleeping? Shot guns? Blow up his house when he's alone?

**Kurokocchi_mybae: (at 2good4u) **Aominecchi, you bastard! **(at ****VMilkshake)** I told you _Tetsuyaforever_ wasn't Akashicchi! He's a serial killer! **(at ****YourRedEmperor)** Akashicchi, you do know that killing is a sin? **(at ****Tetsuyaforever)** You shall not pass! **(at ****food4life) **I've always wanted to tell you something, Murasakibaracchi. I stole your candies during Teiko days and blamed it on Midorimacchi. **(at ****OhaAsaLover) **You deserved it.

**OhaAsaLover: (at Kurokocchi_mybae)** Kise, you are the epitome of sheer stupidity. I was going to remain silent and watch your death, but now that you've spoken the truth, I must say something. Go to hell and stay there! Oha Asa says you are on bad terms with everyone tonight.

**food4life: (at Kurokocchi_mybae) **How dare you do that, Kise-chin! **(at ****YourRedEmperor) **Can I help you crush him, Aka-chin?

**YourRedEmperor: (at food4life)** As much as I appreciate your enthusiasm, Atsushi, you cannot kill him. Ryota is mine. Stay away from this. **(at ****OhaAsaLover)** You too, Shintaro. **(at ****Kurokocchi_mybae)** Killing is a sin and so is lying. Tetsuya is my boyfriend; he'll never be yours. You should've never lied in the first place no matter how deluded you are, Ryota.

**Tetsuyaforever: (at Kurokocchi_mybae)** You're dead. Don't escape. We're hunting you down tonight.

**Kurokocchi_mybae: (at VMilkshake) **SAVE ME, KUROKOCCHI!... Kurokocchi?

**OhaAsaLover: (at Kurokocchi_mybae)** Kuroko's account has been deleted. I assume he could not bear to witness your death. I, too, am logging off now. I am much too mad at you to bid you a proper farewell, but have fun in hell.

**Food4life: (at Kurokocchi_mybae)** You liar. I'm going to eat with Muro-chin now!

**YourRedEmperor: (at Kurokocchi_mybae)** It would take me much more than 140 characters to fully express how dangerous I am feeling right now. You've wasted my time with Tetsuya.

**Tetsuyaforever: (at Kurokocchi_mybae)** And now you must bear the consequences of your actions. By the way, Tetsuya is _my_ bae.

**Kurokocchi_mybae: (at Tetsuyaforever, YourRedEmperor) **So Kurokocchi belongs to which of the two of you? I'll give him to you guys in exchange for my life.

**Tetsuyaforever: (at YourRedEmperor) **Shall we time it?

**Kurokocchi_mybae: (at Tetsuyaforever)** Huh?

**Tetsuyaforever/YourRedEmperor: (at Kurokocchi_mybae)** Tetsuya belongs to me.

**Kurokocchi_mybae: (at Tetsuyaforever, YourRedEmperor) **Feeling mind fucked right now... You guys are two separate people!

**VMilkshake: (at Kurokocchi_mybae)** I am disappointed in you, Kise-kun. You made me reactivate my account just so that I could inform you of this. Meet Oreshi and Bokushi. Nice job. All my hard work has gone to waste. Hope you die.

**[VMilkshake account re-deleted.] **

**[Kurokocchi_mybae account mysteriously wiped off from the virtual world.] **

**[YourRedEmperor/Tetsuyaforever logged off.] ***cue the screams from a certain house*

**SatsukiHere: (at Everyone)** I BAKED SOME CUPCAKES! …Ara? Where'd you all go?

And they all lived happily ever after...

* * *

><p><strong>AN:** Okay. Time to clear somethings up and answer/reply your reviews~

Loryko: I plan on adding some more XD

Reality Slap: No problem. glad you enjoyed and laughed and yeah, whatever you did :D

Koichii: Sure! You can join their movie marathon, just don't interrupt their lovey dovey moments. Picture a mad Akashi if you Siriusly did that. Hahaha. ;)

Misa/Aya: Oh yes. I do plan on continuing all of them :)

Guest: look forward to some more giggling? lol.

AokazuSei: huh. that does make sense! XD

Scarlet Aki-chin: Enjoy~ *^*

Tetchin: Will do *salutes you* thanks for reading~

The Mafia-ish Addiction: *sigh* will never get over your name...mafia? what a drool worthy name! And yes, pick up lines~ :3

Prettylipstick/hiyori-chan: Uh. I have no idea what you guys are talking about. lol. I don't have a tumblr anymore and I don't have a fanpage. *shrugs* must be another person with my name? **EDIT/UPDATE:** I just added this notice after reading some PM's. So to clear up the confusion and, I guess make my presence known to the fraud me or whoever, I created a tumblr blog or whatever you want to call it. Feel free to look at it. lol. A forewarning though, it's pretty empty for now. You wanted it. Ahem, PM people. This time, I go by my fanfic penname: Belles7. There's a link on my profile. ;)

As usual, the few (this time, few) pickup lines came from the pickuplinesgalore place.


	5. Chapter 5

**Flirtatious**

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><p>Summary: Medieval AU pick up lines?<p>

A/N: So I was in my medieval Europe class today and well, yeah, this happened! hahaha~

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><p>Once upon a time there lived a miraculous knight who went by the name of Akashi Seijuro. He embarked on a daring and bold journey in order to save the fair princess locked up in the stone tower. Not! Akashi Seijuro was no knight. He was the Royal Captain to the Teiko Kingdom, the right hand man of the Teiko King Nijimura Shuzo. Currently, the royal captain was standing in front of his lord with a hand lightly gripping the hilt of his sword. Whenever he moved his body, his shiny silver armor glittered from the sunlight that beamed into the throne room; even the slightest movement reflected light.<p>

"Shuzo, what is it." Yes. The redhead captain called the king by his first name; they were on good terms and their relationship was not limited to lord and vassal. In fact, it was more like family, family to the point that they easily and comfortably nagged and critiqued each other with harsh tones.

King Nijimura raked a hand through his dark locks and replied, "There's a competition. We were invited to participate."

"And?"

"All the kingdoms will be attending."

"So what? You wish to participate."

"The reward is territory."

Both males now wore a smile on their face. Territory? Gained territory meant Teiko expansion and Teiko expansion meant more people under their rule and more people meant more slaves, ahem they mean, indentured servants or serfs. Plainly put, more power to the Teiko Kingdom. Oh and don't forget the economic benefits that came with more land and more laborers.

Akashi cocked his head, shifting his weight onto the other foot. "And what is the competition about?"

"Kamata West Kingdom's princess was kidnapped and is now held captive in an abandoned fortress/castle. Their king wants all the neighboring kingdoms to send one representative and whoever rescues his daughter first will gain all of his territory."

"Kamata West? What happened to his twin sons?"

Nijimura smirked. "They were burnt to crisp from the dragon guarding her tower."

"What a pity that his sons were killed. No wonder why he's so desperate to save his daughter," the captain replied, monotone.

"You don't sound sad."

"Well. I'm not. I was actually looking forward to the day where I get to stab those twins in the guts with my own sword."

Nijimura laughed. "You're still upset about that?"

"They insulted you, Shuzo. It doesn't matter whether they're princes or gods. They will pay and unfortunately, fate got them before I could." A scowl marred the redhead's face as he crossed his arms, tapping a foot in irritation.

"Never mind that, Akashi. I am sending you to the game tomorrow. Rescue the princess and make Teiko expand."

"Of course. Who else is better than me?"

"There is no one."

"Exactly. Who is attending?"

Nijimura opened a scroll and informed, "Most of them are the royal guards from the other kingdoms."

"Like?"

"Aomine Daiki from Touou. Kise Ryota from Kaijo. Midorima Shintaro from Shutoku. Murasakibara Atsushi from Yosen. Kuroko Tetsuya from Seirin-"

"Seirin? The baby kingdom."

The king nodded. "Yes. They are participating as well."

"I've met all the others, but this Kuroko Tetsuya, I have never heard of before."

"That's most likely because Seirin is a new kingdom."

"I know that."

"Then why say it, Akashi?"

"Never mind. Forget the rest. I will defeat all of them, Shuzo. After all-"

"Yes. I know you are absolute. Scurry along now. Traveling to the destination might take a while."

"No one dares to ambush me when I'm traveling, Shuzo."

"Yes. I imagine they would all know that by now, especially after you decorated the road with numerous bodies and blood trails."

"Don't forget the detached limbs and rolling heads, _my king_."

"You dare humor me?"

Akashi simply chuckled to himself as he sauntered out the throne room, leaving the king to frown. "Tch. Akashi, what the hell is wrong with your brain?"

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><p>The very next day at the abandoned fortress, some of the participants were muttering in awe and admiration whereas others were staring at the redhead captain with an annoyed look. What was so good about Akashi Seijuro riding on a stupid white horse as he crossed the cobblestone bridge? It wasn't that appealing.<p>

"What a show off," Aomine muttered as he sat on a tree stump, looking bored as ever. They were all waiting in front of the large, vacant, gothic-styled castle and the moment Akashi's horse stepped foot onto the property, the fortress's ebony gates slammed shut.

"Welcome!" a man's voice boomed. He walked out from behind a pillar in one of the outdoor hallways and strolled over to them. "I am pleased that you could all make it. Save my daughter and I shall give my land to you!"

"Why give your kingdom in exchange for one mere girl?" someone asked.

Kise nodded, pursing his lips. "Is your daughter that good? Is she a drop dead killer beauty like Aphrodite?"

"Big breasts?" Aomine added.

"Hn." Midorima adjusted his glasses. He held a cross embedded with jewels in one hand. "Actually, the princess possesses divine powers or so that is what the rumors say."

"Hah?" Aomine and Kise simultaneously remarked in shock.

"Who the hell are you!" Aomine suddenly asked. "How would you know?"

"Enough!" the king shouted, swiping his hand in the air to get their attentions again. "There's no time to make small talk and befriend each other. You have a mission to complete!"

"Oi," Aomine said, turning to look at the king now. He gave the man a dark glare. "You better watch your mouth or else I'm leaving."

A purple-haired man dressed in his full armor asked, "Ne, where's the feast? I was told we'd be given a banquet."

"What?" the king asked, incredulous.

"No banquet?" the giant muttered darkly. Suddenly, he seemed to be even taller and more fearful. "I'm leaving then."

"Wait!" the king said, forcing a smile. "Of course there is a banquet! The winner gets my kingdom and a feast to celebrate their boldness and courage."

The giant stopped in the middle of his track and nodded. "Okay."

The king sighed under his breath. _I never knew royal guards could be so rude! And I never said anything about a celebratory feast! How dare they try to milk me of my riches! My kingdom alone is enough for these fools!_

"Enter the castle and find my daughter. She should be located in the highest tower from what I was told by my sons prior to their deaths. Be wary of the dragon who guards the castle."

"Ha. Yeah," Aomine muttered as he stalked over to the castle's door. "Wouldn't want to end up dead like your sons."

The king gaped. "How insensitive!"

Kise shrugged. "I didn't really like them to be honest."

The blonde carried on and Midorima paused to look at the king. "Your sons were extremely ill-mannered."

Murasakibara didn't even bother to spare a glance at the man as he followed the other participants. Akashi finally appeared in front of the king whose eyes widened at the sight. "You're from Teiko."

The redhead nodded. "Glad you know that. You're sons were going to be killed by me one day. I suppose fate took pity on them and saved them from my wrath."

"What?" the king asked, panic-stricken. "What did they do to you, great captain? Please tell me. I must atone for their wrongdoings against you and your king!"

"The past is the past," Akashi merely responded, entering the castle now. A blue-haired, armor-clad male popped out of nowhere and bowed politely at the king. "Domo."

Too speechless to say anything, the king only nodded and watched the last participant enter the dark castle. He muttered, "May the best man win." That's if they didn't kill each other in order to win.

* * *

><p>"So there really is a dragon," Midorima murmured to himself as he took cover behind a stone pillar. He wiped the ashy smudge from his face, grimacing at the dark marks on his hand. Damn dragon almost lit him on fire.<p>

"Haha! What's the matter, pretty boy?" Aomine taunted as he also hid behind a different pillar, looking at Kise who yelped as he ran away from the dragon. "Where's your man pride now, huh!"

The blonde guard dove onto the ground and rolled away as fast as he could. Every time his armor hit the floor, it made a chinking sound. He barely took cover before a blast of dark red fire came hurling at him. "Saved!"

"Tch." Aomine grimaced. "He's still alive."

Meanwhile, Akashi was walking up a flight of stairs in the dark. Someone had tried to shove him off the spiral staircase earlier and whoever it was ended up dropping down to the bottom floor. There were the sounds of cracking bones and the person's armor smashing against the cold hard ground. Those were pleasing sounds to Akashi himself, knowing that he went undefeated once again.

The redhead spotted five doors once he reached the top of the staircase. He randomly opened one and entered the silent but dark corridor. The place reeked of an old vacant smell, but there was a tint of smoke lingering around in the air. Suddenly, he was tackled to the ground as a person hovered over him. Before he could react, the person hushed him with "Shhh."

Akashi shoved the person off him and an arrow pierced the wall he once stood in front of. Soon, he was being dragged somewhere away from their attacker. The person, whom he could not see in the dark, remarked, "That was quite rude of you to do, especially since I just saved your life."

"I didn't need you to intercept the attack…your name?"

"You first. I don't give my name to strangers unless they do so first."

"Akashi Seijuro. Remember it."

"Hm. Kuroko Tetsuya."

"Where are you taking us?"

"To shelter obviously, unless you want to be pierced with a poison-laced arrow again."

"How would you know it was poisoned? And why should I trust you?"

Kuroko turned a corner. "Because I could smell it. I specialize in the use of senses. Trust me because everyone has turned against each other. Besides, doesn't it make you feel better to know that you have someone watching your back?"

Akashi arched a brow in curiosity. "Is that how you're easily leading us in the dark? And no. I prefer to work alone, Tetsuya."

"I train in the dark. My eyes are used to this kind of setting. You are a lone wolf then, Akashi-kun?"

"Yes."

Kuroko smiled in the dark, glad to know that someone shared common interests as him. "So am I."

"Really?"

"Yes. I prefer to handle things by myself. Less chances for mistakes."

"You're from Seirin, aren't you?"

"Well I recently transferred to Seirin, so yes."

"Where are you originally from then?"

"Teiko."

Red-yellow eyes widened. "What? I've never heard of you before. Are you lying, Tetsuya?"

Akashi yanked his hand away from the blue head's, narrowing his eyes in suspicion. He could hear footsteps rushing towards their direction. A brightly burning torch glowed at the end of the other hallway as the person neared and now, the royal captain of Teiko could make out the mysterious male's features. Blue hair. Ocean-like eyes. Fair skin. Soft-looking lips. Short stature. An armor that looked way too big on him.

Kuroko also took in the man's slightly taller form, his heterochromatic eyes, and bloody red hair. "I've heard of you before, Akashi-kun. Though, I'm positive you've also heard of my alias name."

"Wha-"

The blue head flicked his wrist and a tiny blade soared at the enemy, piercing the man in the pulse region of the neck before he crumpled to the floor. The torch landed on the ground with a loud thump and soon fire scorched the corridor, swallowing up everything in its path.

"Shall we run, Akashi-kun?"

"You don't need to even ask that, Tetsuya."

Once again, Kuroko held Akashi's hand as they ran through the hallways, literally running for their lives. As they did this, they casually conversed.

"What were you saying before about your name, Tetsuya?"

"My alias name was Black Death."

"You're lying."

"Well, Black Death is supposedly dead. I shed that title a long time ago and reverted to my original name. It's up to you whether you want to believe that or not, Akashi-kun."

"If Black Death was still alive today, he'd be an old man."

"That's my fake profile, Akashi-kun. Don't be so gullible. People would freak out if I said I was a 13 year old boy killing people twice my size back then."

"Why did you fake your death?"

"Isn't it obvious? I wanted a new life, a new beginning. No more killing people, no more blood-stained hands. Come on; let's hide in here for the time being. People are coming our way." Kuroko shoved Akashi into the room before he could say anything and quickly shut the door.

"How did you know people were coming our way?"

The blue head pointed at his ears. "Auditory sense."

"Right," Akashi murmured, turning around to see a girl covered in ropes. She had a piece of torn cloth shoved in her mouth as she sat bound to a metal chair, unconscious. "I thought the king said she was in the highest tower."

Kuroko soundlessly walked over to her and her eyes flashed open, full of fear. She shook her head and writhed around, making the blue head hold his hands up as a sign of peaceful coming. "I'm here to rescue you."

She cocked her head and lifted her face, jutting her mouth at him. Kuroko took the cloth out from her mouth and she gasped for air like a fish on land. Akashi crossed his arms, leaning against the door. "What happened to you?"

She relaxed as Kuroko worked on freeing her from the ropes and said, "My twin brothers took me and held me captive in this place. They were upset that our father focused only on me."

"Hm. I figured it was something like that. Who would want Kamata West Kingdom's children anyways," Akashi commented. She frowned, taking offense to his statement. "Have no fear; your brothers were killed by that dragon."

Her eyes widened in shock. "My brothers were killed?"

"At least you won't have to worry about your safety anymore," Kuroko replied, stepping away from her.

She stood up, rubbing her wrists. "Yes. But they are family. I…must morn for their deaths."

"Alright. Go on ahead then," Akashi said, opening the door. He pointed at the exit with a thumb. "And while you're at it, escort yourself out the castle and clear things up with your father."

"But aren't you supposed to rescue me? You're knights!"

Akashi and Kuroko looked at each other before they each made their own responses.

"I'm not a knight. I'm a royal guard of Teiko. It's not my duty to protect you."

"I'm also not a knight as well, my lady. I'm an assassin."

She recoiled in fear from the blue head, moving closer to Akashi now. The captain simply ushered her out the door and before he closed it, he informed, "Walk a few more corridors and you'll see some people waiting for you. They might be fighting, but just keep in mind that they're fighting for you. Best of luck."

"Wasn't that a bit too much, Akashi-kun?"

The redhead shrugged. "I didn't sign up to babysit nor did I sign up to meddle with family drama."

"I suppose so."

"Why did you agree to do this competition, Tetsuya?"

"Ah. Well, actually, Kagami-kun was supposed to come but he got injured a few days ago, so I took his place."

"Don't know who that is, but I'm glad _you_ came." Akashi stepped closer to the male, pressing their armors against each other. "I've always wanted to meet the Black Death. If I had known he looked this good, I would have chased after him a long time ago."

"Apparently, I'm infectious."

"Don't believe the rumors you've heard. The Bubonic plague didn't affect my important organs."

Kuroko laughed, brushing off the comment. "And when I used to work in Teiko, someone wanted to be under my apprenticeship."

"I thought you were an older person, Tetsuya." Akashi wrapped an arm around Kuroko's armor-clad waist. "You wouldn't happen to know where a lonely knight could sheath his sword, would you?"

"I thought you said you weren't a knight, Akashi-kun."

"For you, I would become one. They say a knight is always as hard as his armor."

"Hm. Really?" Kuroko tilted his head, mischief gleaming in his eyes. "I can't tell."

"Shall we strip a layer off then, Tetsuya?"

"I am beset by this dragon in my loins, and only you can quench its fire," Kuroko remarked, making the redhead raise both eyebrows in surprise. The blue head shrugged, indifferent. "I heard that one when I was still traveling the lands."

Akashi laughed, stroking the blue locks, and leaned his face closer to Kuroko's. "It seems as if my dragon has finally found a nice cave to rest in."

"So armor off or on?"

"I don't think we can do it with our armors on, Tetsuya," the redhead answered with a laugh.

* * *

><p>A few days later as Nijimura was pacing around in his throne room, a messenger came running into the room with a letter held high in the air. The king took the piece of paper and opened it eagerly, hearing that it was from his right hand man Akashi Seijuro.<p>

_My dear king,_

_I am sure you have heard the news of Kamata West's princess and her twin brothers. Since it was family drama, I decided to not participate in the game. Besides, their kingdom's territory is quite small. What a waste of efforts I say. I also believe fate rewarded me for not killing the twins with my own two hands because on the very day of the game, I met the love of my life: Kuroko Tetsuya. Did you know he originated from Teiko and he also happened to work for your father before he died? Interesting isn't it? _

_I've decided to go on a honeymoon with him. You can't stop me. Consider it as my break from work. After all, I did work non-stop for years. I'm sure you're sad to see your best captain temporarily leave but eventually one day I will come back to Teiko with my husband in tow. Until then Shuzo. _

_Always Absolute, _

_Akashi_ Seijuro.

Nijimura dropped onto his throne, slumping in his seat, and let the paper flutter onto the ground. Great. More trouble was coming to the courts. News about Teiko's top notch royal captain being gay was going to be a big hit in the court's gossip center. Perhaps it would be better if Akashi saved them all the trouble for once and did not return to Teiko? That man was popular enough already. He didn't need to add more oil to the fire.

* * *

><p>AN: And there you have it, guys! :)

credit to: pickuplinesgalore site


	6. Chapter 6

**Flirtatious**

* * *

><p>Summary: There's a problem with this math equation.<p>

A/N: okay, okay guys. I know this one's short but it's...cute? And those damn inequality signs were not saving when I updated this chapter on ffnet! So bear with me and use your imagination to see the respective signs when you read the phrases: "less than" and "greater than". It's a very simple problem. I can assure you :D

Read on!

* * *

><p>Kuroko blinked as he graded his student's homework. There was an extra and unfamiliar problem on this sheet. He did not assign this for homework. He would know that after grading 27 other student's homework problems.<p>

Solve for "i"

9x – 7i _greater than_ 3(3x-7u)

9x – 7i _greater than _9x – 21u

-7i _greater than _-21u

i _less than _3u

Your options, Tetsuya: Yes or date me.

The only problem with this math equation was that...Akashi Seijuro was only 10. The elementary teacher sighed. What was he supposed to do now? No way was he going to become a pedo, that's for sure! His response?

_Seijuro, I'm very glad you took the time to make a math problem like this._

_Please continue your studies and finish college first._

_Until then._

_And don't show this to anyone...or else I'll disappear and go to the place where bad kids go._


	7. Chapter 7

**Flirtatious**

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><p>summary: So there's these two weirdos in the online chat room. What are they talking about?<p>

* * *

><p><strong>-welcome to Rainbow Chat Room-<strong>

_Boobs has just entered the chat_

Boobs: Yo, copycat, where u at?

_I'mnotcopycat has just entered the chat. _

I'mnotcopycat: what do u want, Boobs-cchi?

Boobs: Horikita Mai's coming to tokyo for a shoot. I want you to take me to meet her. duh.

_BlueLover has just entered the chat._

_RedLover has just entered the chat. _

Boobs: who the hell are you two?

BlueLover: aksadsh.

RedLover: rewtwej.

I'mnotcopycat: I thought Akashicchi made this chat room private?

_PurpleTitan has just entered the chat._

PurpleTitan: Aka-chin did do that. He must have let these two newbies in.

_PinkLady has just entered the chat. _

PinkLady: OMG! Nice to meet you two! What are your names?

BlueLover: thkraeksd...afjsifwoiefkl. weteffkleio9.

PinkLady: uh...

RedLover: #%$&*#$

Boobs: I think RedLover just cussed at you, Satsuki.

_Belles7 has just entered the chat. _

Belles7: Actually, Boobs-kun, RedLover said that BlueLover's a very good friend of his.

Boobs: WHO THE HELL ARE YOU!

Belles7: I've been hired to translate RedLover and BlueLover's conversation. You see, they come from an odd planet and the language they speak happens to be-

_Oha Asa has just entered the chat. _

Oha Asa: They speak gibberish.

Belles7: Ah, yes, Oha Asa! They speak (_capital_ G) Gibberish~ I'm surprised you know the alien language.

Oha Asa: Gibberish is not a language.

RedLover: fdsfwejrlwe.

Boobs: What did he say?

Belles7: RedLover said "Don't insult our language."

BlueLover: dewfwjegi Belles7 tewioksda 5237490.

I'mnotcopycat: Ne, ne, what did BlueLover just say?

Belles7: BlueLover told me to keep translating. He'll pay me 5237490...BlueLover, I thought you said we were going higher than that!

BlueLover: fwehiojfio snip snip afweofjwe

Belles7: ok. ok. 5237490 is fine with me.

Oha Asa: "snip snip"?

PinkLady: omg. did he just threaten you?

Belles7: ...

BlueLover: fwejfiooisdfk ndwerwokasge qwoklwer

Belles7: According to the Gibberish language and the Gibberish culture, it is normal to threaten people. It is a sign of love and affection.

RedLover: fwemfoiwjfew Belles7 fwefoikoewaf

BlueLover: dwmeofmwefneoi Belles7? fwmcofoo! #*()#$

PurpleTitan: What did they say?

Belles7: There's been a misunderstanding. RedLover thinks BlueLover likes me. BlueLover just said "Why would I like Belles7? That's bullshit."

Boobs: ouch. You just got rejected.

Belles7: hn.

Oha Asa: So you do like RedLover?

Belles7: THIS IS NOT A CONFESSION ROOM!

PinkLady: My woman's intuition tells me that Belles7 loves RedLover.

I'mnotcopycat: Which explains why you're getting so worked up.

Belles7: ok. do you need translations or not?

Boobs: ...sorry...not sorry. hahahah!

BlueLover: dwemfiowjgcwep dsfmwklgdsl rlwpekgp~~

RedLover: agwempweitpwf$#mvorwg!

Belles7: omg. guys, you can't just say that out in the public!

Boobs: what? What'd they say?!

RedLover: cwewppwrgmoprgpi. ewjiwoeweowgwn. 7 pm.

I'mnotcopycat: uh...what at 7 pm?

BlueLover: fwrnvwpirgjwpoi. wehooifaeryhwrl? vwaerlpihdsdyi.

Belles7: uh...i don't know if I should be saying this to you guys.

PinkLady: TELL US! I WANT TO KNOW SO BAD!

Belles7: rwerwpogjewofod? ok?

RedLover: fwgwirgjwrj.

BlueLover: fwefoiwgjorkpopsnsdj.

Belles7: Okay guys. I just asked them if it's okay for me to translate what they were talking about and they said it's fine.

Boobs: Tell us already.

Oha Asa: For once, I agree with Boobs.

I'mnotcopycat: bwahahah! Boobs~

PinkLady: Hey! Boobs are not to be made fun of!

Belles7: Ahem. Anyways, BlueLover said he wants to fuck the crap out of RedLover. He said he was going to make RedLover melt and scream his name tonight. Then, RedLover said "Not unless I make you scream my name first!"

Boobs: wow. that sounds kind of hot. What happened next?

Belles7: Then RedLover added, "Why don't you come to my house at 7pm?"

PinkLady: omg. they're sooooo in love!

Oha Asa: vulgar actions. It's only lust.

I'mnotcopycat: Belles7-cchi, I feel bad for you. Your love is being crushed right in front of your eyes.

Belles7: So then BlueLover replied, "Sounds good. You think you can take me on? I'll eat you up."

I'mnotcopycat: Why did you just ignore me?

Belles7: I did no such thing. Just doing my job.

Oha Asa: She's in denial, copycat.

I'mnotcopycat: HOW MANY TIMES DO I HAVE TO SAY IT? I AM NOT A COPYCAT!

Belles7: AND I AM NOT IN DENIAL!

_RedLover has just logged off._

_BlueLover has just logged off. _

Boobs: They probably went to go fuck it out.

Belles7: ...okay, maybe I am in denial.

PinkLady: there there, Belles7. You can just log off and go cry yourself to sleep.

Belles7: Nah. I'll just go write some more Akakuro love fics.

_Belles7 has just logged off. _

Oha Asa: Akakuro love fics? She means...Akashi and Kuroko love stories? ...wait...so we are figments of her imagination?

_Belles7 has just entered the chat._

Belles7: Correction-You all belong to Fujimaki.

_Belles7 has just logged off the chat. _

Oha Asa: we're not real?

Boobs: Of course we are. Stop overthinking you horoscope freak. You're scaring copycat.

I'mnotcopycat: ohmygosh! ohmygosh! No! I am real. I mean, just look at my face! LOOK AT THIS MARVELOUS FACE! HOW COULD I NOT BE REAL?


	8. Chapter 8

**Flirtatious**

* * *

><p>Summary: dancing in the rain<p>

* * *

><p><em>Pit pat pit pat.<em> There goes the rain. We danced all night on the street. Forget the curious and odd stares because we're madly in love. That's all that matters, Tetsuya.

_Pit pat pit pat._ There goes the rain. We spun around the street lamps like little kids. So much fun right, Akashi-kun?

_Pit pat pit pat._ There goes the rain. We splashed through the puddles and soaked our shoes wet. I love you, Tetsuya.

_Pit pat pit pat._ There goes the rain. We ran under the rain holding hands. I love you too, Akashi-kun.

_Pit pat pit pat._ There goes the rain. I kissed you first, Tetsuya.

_Pit pat pit pat._ There goes the rain. I kissed you back, Akashi-kun.

_Pit pat pit pat._ There goes the rain. Let's just keep on skipping to our hearts' content.

_Pit pat pit- BOOM!_ There goes the thunder.

"Tetsuya, let's go home now."

"Why? I want to dance in the rain. Let's dance to the thunder's beat while we're at it, Akashi-kun."

"Sounds fun. Then we can go home and cuddle."


	9. Chapter 9

**Flirtatious**

* * *

><p>Summary: Sick Akashi<p>

* * *

><p>Kuroko reached over to touch his lover's forehead. "Your head's burning up, Sei."<p>

Akashi snuggled closer to his phantom, murmuring, "Nah. It's just the warmth of your hand, Tetsuya."

A serious frown appeared on the bluenette's face. "I'm serious. You're sick."

Akashi shook his head playfully. "I got a fever for you, Tetsuya."

Kuroko poked him on the center of his lovely forehead.

Said red head lifted his face to stare inquiringly. "Why did you just poke me, Tetsuya?"

The phantom teen blinked, cocking his head as if he just discovered something new. "Huh. So you're not sleep talking, Sei."

A grin spread on Akashi's face as he wrapped his arms around kuroko's form, tightening his hold now. He glued himself to the shorter boy and said, "I'm wide awake in your arms, Tetsuya. This is no sleep talking. I'm completely serious. I'm in love with you."

Kuroko smiled. "I love you too and cuddling is nice, Sei. I still think you're sick."

"I'm experiencing a case of love sickness. It can cause physical effects from what I know."


	10. Chapter 10

**Flirtatious**

* * *

><p>Summary: love in the snow<p>

* * *

><p>"Akashi-kun!" Kuroko yelled, trying to push his way through the throng of people. As if trying to walk on the snow and not sink wasn't hard enough already, he didn't need anymore people standing in his way. Akashi was stuck somewhere under this large expanse of fallen snow!<p>

"Excuse me," the bluenette murmured. No one noticed him.

He sighed irritably and said louder, "I need to get through please."

Once again, no response and thus the bluenette pushed his way through the crowd. Screw politeness! His boyfriend was trapped somewhere under the snow. Akashi was snowboarding and when he reached the base of the mountain, a miniature avalanche came tumbling down.

One of the mountain rangers suddenly exclaimed, "We found one!"

Kuroko broke through the barrier of people, eager to see Akashi's face. However, it wasn't Akashi. It was some random older guy. He quickly scanned the perimeter and ran over to one of the authorities, asking if they had found a certain red head.

The mountain ranger held up his hands and said, "Hold a second there, young lad. You're speaking way to fast for me to understand you. Take a deep breath."

The bluenette exhaled and continued, "My friend was snowboarding down this mountain as well. He was somewhere around here when the snow came down."

The man nodded, looking around. He placed his hands on Kuroko's tiny shoulders. "Well rest assured, kid. If your friend was around this area, that means he's not stuck too deep under the snow. This is the base of the mountain. If he was somewhere in the middle to upper regions of the mountain, he'd really be stuck or perhaps even a goner."

The man gave Kuroko a wave as he continued to search for the missing snowboarders. All Kuroko could do was pace around in the snow and pray that Akashi was safe.

* * *

><p>While Kuroko was in the middle of pacing, he heard a familiar voice call out to him, saying, "Tetsuya, what are you doing out here? An avalanche just happened. It's not safe for you to be lingering around this place."<p>

The bluenette whirled around to see his boyfriend walking over to him. Blue eyes widened, brimming with tears, and Kuroko sucked in a cold breath of air. He had never felt so relieved in his entire life.

Akashi ran when his blue-haired lover knelt down on the snow, his head drooping. Those blue bangs hiding his eyes. Kuroko hid his face in his arms.

Akashi knelt down and gingerly placed a hand on the boy's arm. "Tetsuya, what's wrong?"

And then there was a sniffle. Red-yellow eyes widened. "Tetsuya, did someone bother you while I was gone?"

No response.

Akashi looked around, assessing the people nearby. He hugged Kuroko and said again, "Tetsuya, what happened?"

There came a muffled voice. "I thought you died."

Akashi paled. "What?"

"I thought the snow crushed you."

"Tetsuya," Akashi murmured, squeezing the smaller frame even tighter now. "I am absolute. Nature could never-"

"I THOUGHT YOU FLED FROM ME AND WENT TO HEAVEN, AKASHI-KUN!" Kuroko suddenly exclaimed. He peered up at the red head who shut his mouth, simply staring at the puffy blue eyes; tinges of red marked Kuroko's face. Tears streamed down as kuroko gripped Akashi's red scarf. A happy yet sad smile broke out on his face.

Akashi gently brought Kuroko's messy face to his chest, patting his head as he soothed, "Tetsuya, I told you I was going to be in the café. Were you not listening earlier?"

"But I saw you snowboarding down the mountain."

"You know I'm not the only one with red hair in this world, Tetsuya."

There was a light sniffle as Kuroko sighed. "Unless I'm just imagining you."

Akashi frowned. "You're in shock."

"Maybe this is all a dream." Kuroko pulled away from Akashi who shook his head in disbelief.

"I am alive and well, Tetsuya."

"You're a ghost."

"No I am not."

Kuroko grabbed a handful of snow and threw it in Akashi's face. The red head blinked, feeling the cold and harsh impact sting his face. "Tetsuya that hurt."

"So you're not a ghost."

Akashi tackled Kuroko onto the snow, now hovering over him. He lowered his face to Kuroko's and cupped the warm cheeks. "Can a ghost kiss you like this?"

Kuroko shut his eyes as those familiar lips met his. Akashi's tongue traced his bottom lip and soon slid into his mouth. Then, the bluenette remembered that they were in public and shoved him off.

"Akashi-kun," he panted, staring at the red head who lied on the snow smirking. Akashi simply replied, "I love you too. If you want, you can say that I came back from heaven, Tetsuya."

Kuroko grabbed another batch of snow and threw it at his lover, grinning.

"Oh you're really asking for it now, Tetsuya."

Akashi grabbed his own handful of snow and easily caught the running bluenette where he then shoved the snow down the front of Kuroko's shirt. His cold hands trailed down Kuroko's chest as he pulled him closer, muttering in a husky voice, "You won't mind getting cold now, Tetsuya."

"I'll get sick though, Akashi-kun."

"Don't worry. We're going back to the cabin."

Kuroko smiled. "So you're going to warm me up, Akashi-kun?"

"We can get the fire place burning."

"Literally?" the bluenette asked, running back to the cabin.

Akashi watched his lover run ahead of him and chuckled. "Run while you can, Tetsuya."


End file.
